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Sunday, December 25, 2022

12.25.22 christmas day and the last night of Hanukkah more articles from the past

i wrote this post last night before i went to sleep, but only in my mind and  this morning much of it is lost.
I went on my first post surgery bike ride yesterday, not too far, but enough to put some sress on everything.
As the weddings approach i realize how much of that is tied to what i am doing, living someone else's  life for someone else who is part of someone else's perfect world, and this world is far from perfect.   No one wins, it is a game of percentages, how much is lost because of one bad decision, on one series of decisions or hesitancy at a moment of crisis or acting when no act is required.

i cannot tell how far in the past these articles are, i did not check, but they are dated except for the last one which is recent, perhaps from today or yesterday, at least when it was shared with me.

https://www.nature.com/articles/d41586-020-02005-0


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDfSe4sjmNw


https://www.newsweek.com/quantum-physics-gender-binaries-1516315

https://www.facebook.com/100083165393815/posts/154703390645173/?mibextid=Nif5oz
The last article takes me back only to yesterdqy in terms of when i read it, but it takes me back a decade when i think of what it means.
How easy it would have been to have been visited by 3 ghosts last night who would tell me what to do next.  But there were no ghosts and I woke up to nothing but darkness, cold and coffee that was a couple of days old, at least a day past its prime.

It is quiet now, the afternoon is long although darkness is at least an hour away..  I have had 9,000 steps today compared to the 14000 yesterday, 11 stairs compared to to 12 yesterday; but i can get the last steps if i want and perhaps i could get the steps, but I am so tired, i will rest for a while. Come to me in my dreams. 



Tuesday, December 20, 2022

12.20.22

 

This was unexpected, but life is full of shocks and the unknown ending in a darkness which appears all to certain.

Sunday, December 18, 2022

Articles from 2020: 121822 Happy Hannukah

https://scitechdaily.com/quantum-physicists-crack-mystery-of-strange-metals-a-new-state-of-matter/


https://youtu.be/OfxoM6trtZE

I am not assuming you will ever read this and i write to you almost every day, so I may not be able to excuse this.
I asked chat gpt (you need to check it out if  you have never seen it but I am sure you have) what I should say and it said something about that i am thinking about you and am here if you ever want to chat.  
I would like to speak with you, but my heart seizes up when I look at my phone as I often do and look at the last text or the last time I callled.  I know it must sound absurd or even imature to you.  
I am still your friend, hidden somewhere in this impossibly deep morass of emotions, although i love you too much, perhaps need you too much to be a trusted friend.  I was that once.  I dream about you more often than I would have imagined, including last night.  So this is my present to myself this first night of Hanukah.
There is a prayer only said on the first night of Hanukah that thanks god for bringing us safely to this season and I hope you are safe.  
I could go on for some time here, but I will keep this short since I am likely writing this to myself.  Happy Hanukah to the love who is also my best friend, however lost to me you are.

Saturday, December 10, 2022

From 8.14 20 to add to list

 https://scitechdaily.com/physicists-cast-doubt-on-neutrino-theory-exotic-subatomic-particle-may-not-exist-at-all/

https://youtu.be/OLHxxBTl71I

https://www.investors.com/news/nuclear-fusion-startup-zap-energy-gets-investment-dow-jones-oil-giant-chevron/

https://www.vice.com/en_uk/article/4ay5w3/lasers-made-of-spacetime-wave-packets-are-breaking-the-normal-rules-of-light

https://www.forbes.com/sites/startswithabang/2020/08/12/a-spacetime-surprise-time-isnt-just-another-dimension/#1a2f9a6f47dc

https://femanin.com/2022/11/10/signs-youre-a-toxic-person/?utm_source=gallery2&utm_medium=gallery2-George-lou5_495_signsyoureatoxicperson1_20221209183553_202212100800alk1530000s1-al-k-15&utm_campaign=lou5_495_signsyoureatoxicperson1_20221209183553_202212100800alk1530000s1-usmobileandroid1-1&aniview=1&ajax=1&cloud=1&adhesion=1&landing=1&fbclid=IwAR0VDpn6uidhEJ9mrQkLAKKhNlR8xx0Rx6P3MhzsEXWtbSfYMhUash7mcz0&slide=1


https://phys.org/news/2020-08-scientists-quantum-states-longer.html

Saturday, December 3, 2022

12322

 That should have gone in my other blog. I am ok, maybe not fine yet, but ok and everything is working. 3 weeks recovery if nothing goes amiss.

Thursday, December 1, 2022

12.1.22

 Surgery today.  Minor because it isn't happening to you.  Were anything to happen and were anyone to ask my last thoughts would be (are) of you.

Very complex times as things hang in the balance.

Monday, October 24, 2022

102422

It is Monday.  Slept ok yesterday despite minimal exercise and tea for lunch.  at one point in time a cat came a curled up beside me to take a bath without begging to eat.  Today will be busy, but it seems unlikely i will pursue any of the army grants except the white paper which is something that is looking more and more like the short email i have sent to some of the army program managers.

I need to look at the large fusion grant again today, see if it is still there or not.  No word from the national labs, they are so slow it is frustrating.  In any event anything before next year seems unlikely although i feel like some things are out there, certainly the 4 year thing is still pending a year later; unless it is not.

I am curious about how things will go over the next few weeks as I finish up the year in terms of science, patents, grants and presentations.  12122 will introduce the recovery phase of life and an excess of stillness until around the 15th at which point i should be mostly healed, just in time for the holiday season which i suppose will be well underway, having stated to some extent at the end of next month.

It will be a little bleak without any funding, but I have made quite a bit of progress with things and i have no reason to complain about the progress on every front except funding right now.  This week and next will involve the exchange of a lot of information.

Verified to __ digits that the AuT method of calculating pi with fpix follows other methods.  It appears based on this that at least curvature is the result of an iterated equation and that a natural consequence is that all of the universe is fractal.

I have also verified that the first 3 lines of the pte can be calculated in broad terms as to teh proton and neutron counts utilizing overlapping Fibonacci spirals constrained by a circle defined by pi.

It seems more likely than not that manipulation based on targeting the resulting fractal elements and the iterated equations giving rise to them would lead to efficiencies where those elements were targeted.

This was lunch today.  I received some very negative views from a friend of mine i sent this to who had otherwise wanted to go to lunch; but i assure you it was delicious if you like this kind of thing.
This is what I was eating a year ago today for lunch, a chile on top of a garden burger (lots of onion since you weren't there I didn't have to worry about my breath.

The morning was spent organizing and the afternoon is being spent working on the necessary edits to the next provision which I may not file today because of the need to fix drawings along with the edits needed.
I did two bike rides in the morning (to the office and back) giving me 10 workouts (cheating) in the last 7 days and a whopping 88 IM to start off the week.  I really need to swim this afternoon, but too much work to do and this evening is pretty full.
It's late afternoon.  I managed to get through the majority of the changes before word started acting up, this was mostly in the first 17 pages of the provisional which is problematic because 5-14 need more attention than I can give them this late in the day when my mind and vision is fogged pretty badly.
.What that means is that I need to pick this up tomorrow when there is a lot of work to deal with tomorrow which is otherwise a full day.  No email on the meeting yet, so i have a little more time to deal with he details there.  I am a little anxious.
I have some great pictures for today which I may post tomorrow.   Its worth seeing anyway, the right way would have been together last year but perhaps there is a reason for how things happened. It still doesn't seem right to think it will never be shared.