The electron and time

It is 5:00 in the morning.  I wrote this post late last night.
There  is a madness about me.
Uncomfortable.
It is no small wonder I swim so hard
Only in that expenditure of energy
suspended sans weight, sound and sight
do i find a moments peace
but it costs a lot in terms of energy
there were weeks last summer where every day i swam
until the muscles would no longer loosen up
all to put off the madness
You have the luxury to stop reading
To never deal with me again
I do not.
And that brings me to this post.  Finished in darkness and now edited in darkness. For I did not dare to post it last night because I needed to think about it and what it suggested and what it might mean.
When you read it, remember that it is written by someone who is at least half mad.  It may be your fault. Also remember that I did not invent pi, it exists alone.  I did not develop the conversion equations for mass and matter or make the observations for minimum size black holes, nor the big bang, nor make observations of time and space that support so fully logic of AuT.
I did not go looking for a definition of time so much as one found me.
And so here is another look at the electron in a way that also looks at time.

If AuT has shown anything other than the fact that i am a genius (or a moron) it is that things are not what they seem.
You think you know me, but have no idea what I am.
And perhaps you do not know space and time
Though you think you do.

Space is dimensionless though we think its in 3 dimensions and even see it that way, but it is a dimensional chimera, when we try to grasp it, it slips through our fingers.  However, in the last few years, AuT has shown that it has structure.

AuT has shown other things.
Photons are compressed space.  The  big bang wasn't.
And electrons may not be electrons at all.

Looking at the electron through the lens of AuT raises a number of questions.
There was one which led to this post.  The way I originally phrased it was as follows: "Perhaps the most pressing one is "what is the role of electrons in the transfer of intermediate history carrying ct states."  This is important because one of two things appears to be the case: 1) electrons are critical to the transfer of ct3 states or 2) electrons result from the exchange of the intermediate history carrying ct states.

The answer that is suggested is that electrons are not a thing at all.  Instead electrons reflect the ct3 exchanges between ct4ish protons and the rest of the universe.  This raises some obvious questions that I will get to in due course, the most obvious is "what about neutrons, the stable form of ct4?  It is worth considering because it suggests that time as we know it doesn't exist for the neutron.  This, frighteningly, is not inconsistent with gravitational time dilation.

Indeed, the idea that time as we experience it only exists within the narrow range of ct3-ct4 transitions is hardly mind bending once you accept the basic premise of AuT. Time is affected by increased ct1 substitutions (velocity) and by gravity which seems to eliminate some forms of ct3 substitution, but which ones?   The electron becomes a candidate.

Enough of the talking around the subject, what does "the electron" become in this scenario?
One suggestion is that there is no "electron"as such.  The phenomena we observe as the electron is the proton dealing with ct3 exchanges, radiating and receiving packets of information from the surrounding environment, packets of ct3, packets of time.

There are numerous issues and tests that are suggested.  Is a proton separated from electron clouds free of time?  Gravitational time dilation suggests the answer is yes. If a proton is stripped of electron clouds and put into an environment with time, will it spontaneously generate an electron (time exchange) field?   The answer should be yes, but what does it mean if it doesn't?  Can we really do a test which is clean enough to do this where the other features of acceleration and ambient states are absent?  Is it any crazier to look at the electron as something which is entirely different while it still has mass?  How do we deal with the mass aspects of electrons?  If electrons have mass and history is embodied in the electron exchange, does history have mass?

I went on and on all night asking these questions and looking for answers where none were to be found, looking for answers for my life where none were to be found, looking for you and knowing I would not find you.

I cannot answer many of those questions, but Einstein and others proved that mass and energy interchanged, that the two slot test for electrons yielded a wave dispersion and not a particle one.

The whole charge issue remains one which bothers me.  Even accepting all the change, why would bundles of ct3, time or not, appear oppositely charged?  An unstable ct3-ct4 transition state may, but need not, have charge.  If this is the case, why don't these packets of time come in every possible quantum size between the photon and the proton?  Why is this particular, measurable size stable?  What does this have to do with the quantum nature of time as we experience it?

There are easier questions to think about, why do they appear, upon the introduction of energy, to move away, discretely, from the proton?   This suggest little more than destabilizing them with ct2 states within the inner shell.

Should we talk about ct3 bundles smaller than electrons?  Electrons should potentially result from clouds of ct3 which bundle under certain circumstances but which otherwise balance the ct4 state of the proton.

The balance might be that the breakdown points of ct3 is the electron and the compression point of the proton to neutron is the proton.

Velocity time dilation separates or perhaps balances time with perceived movement but discretely.  These things take time.  AuT wasn't created in a day.  There were many wrong terms, wrong turns, mistaken assumptions, choices that had to be made, explored to a dead end, abandoned paths to be returned to and explored.

I did not go looking for time, so much as it found me.  I did not go looking for the connection between time and the electron so much as it forced itself upon me.

I sit in the darkness and the silence waiting for something, some insight, some answer, you.