I have been away for 3 months and things are beginning to unravel at work. I need to get back and see what is happening. I thought I would go back, but I did not. This is a test of some future, I suppose. Did I pass or fail?
I am unprepared. I started looking at routes back. 20 hours and there is a void there towards the end where I see nothing. I am not ready to go back, things here are unfinished.
My dream, I suppose, was that you would come here. And then what? You'd save me? I'd save you? We'd somehow destroy one another?
I am not happy about this, but everything has been up and down and I am exhausted and worried and I don't know that i can avoid what is happening there any more.
Perhaps it was cleaning and planning, once I started I could not relax or stop.
I am cold and lonely and more than a little scared although there ae so many reasons to be optimistic and not terrified at least for the moment. The terror lies in success as much as in failure.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XwOeJW_9HU
The top of 80 peaks, looking at the next closest (jakes?)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PivWY9wn5ps
My problems are small, but I have a big hammer and I don't know what to do with it. Where do you start?
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