I felt emptier than normal
knowing that tonight
you had let me down
by being the smarter
of the two of us
not making me make
a difficult decision
and I will not be seeing
our meeting my family
frightening to consider
but that is not happening
instead I'll lie awake
afraid that without
being able to swim
before dawn breaks
I'll face the day
without answers
without the evening before
without peace
without you
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